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Happy Tile Cleaner, The

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I love my tile!!
Use a toothbrush, scrub it clean,
Make it shiny so that it reflects your smile.
And when I'm through,
Go outside and scrub the hallway
Where somebody scuffed it with their tennis shoe.

¡Yo quiero tile!
(Spanish verse, which Weston needs to transcribe here...)

Long time ago back in ancient rome they had tile floors beneath their domes, mosaics big and pretty.
Later on in ancient Byzantine ("tien" like tie) they had a sleek ceramic shine from tile in their city.


Comes from an Italian spot cooked in ovens blazing hot with tile in their belly
And your mothers brand new kitchen floor has high-tech fancy tile galore so messy spills won't rot and get smelly.
If we had no tile, we'd have no (insert things with tile, spoken)
If we had no tile, we'd have no fast food restraunts to make us food.

I love my tile (to end)


Originally entitled
"The Happy Tile Cleaner", a Latin Groove Tune
later called
"A Latin Fantasia"

Solo by Weston
except the "Pizza" part by Tim

Weston regularly pulls his hamstring when he does the splits during this song. Or, did, but he's too old and frail to do that now.

Did I mention that he wears diapers?

Original, English second verse:

I love my tile!!
If it's clean then I am happy;
Ugly grout and mildew stains are dark and vile.
I clean all day,
Working hard inside the bathroom
Scrubbing all those nasty yellow stains away.

Did I mention that I wear diapers?

And that I LIKE it?

I'm also a little miffed that this song doesn't get sung all the time by other groups like Star Wars and Harry Potter do. *miffle*