Retired or Emerging : Mr. Fabulous
by day he's a teacher at the local city college
He gives the impression that he's really rather plain
But at night when the evil world wakes up
And out come men (those) who are vile and corrupt
This plain man seeks to protect what's just
He becomes our hero: he is Mister Fabulous!
Mister Fabulous has a fabulous life
A fabulous car and a fabulous wife.
Gets fabulous mail and fabulous faxes,
Pays fabulous bills and fabulous taxes.
Mister Fabulous has a fabulous day
With fabulous dye for his fabulous gray
Has a fabulous door with a fabulous doorknob
A Fabulous face with a fabulous nose job
Mister Fabulous has charisma and wit
And fabulous cream for his fabulous zit.
Blows fabulous air with his fabulous sneezes;
Has fabulous pain when he catches diseases.
He has hair impenetrable by radiation,
Bulging biceps, dazzling smile and super suit;
He's the hero for the rising generation
In his stretchy tights and sissy cape and shiny go-go boots.
Inst. Bridge (tune: ) into:
Mister Fabulous hates to fight.
He would rather use his stunning logic to discuss an issue So, when criminals strike at night,
You will find our hero staying home and eating bon-bons while he watches classic movies with his mother.
Inst. Bridge (tune: ) into:
Mister Fabulous is both daring and brave
*Which will probably lead to his fabulous grave
*Has a pet lobster named Fabulous Dave
*loves his pet marmasett named Fabulous Dave
His Fabulous punch sends enemies reeling
*He weeps like a child when you hurt his feeling
*He's likely to cry if you hurt his feeling
And when he puts gas in the car, you know he'll go
Mister Fabulous is incredibly strong
But sounds like a girl when he's singing this song (Mister Fabulous)
Gets very confused when he's putting his clothes on
Gets jiggy with joy when he's shaking his bon-bon
His red cape is blowing his underwear's showing
#16 on udder won, meaning it was the last song to be cut from the album. It is totally recorded, we just didn't have time to edit and mix and make it album-worthy. You'll be seeing this one soon. [editor's note: two years after typing that, it still has not materialized].
udder won extra list:
#16 was Mr. Fabulous, #17 The Pirate Song, #18 The Wedding Song, #19 A Man Who's Not Afraid To Cry, #20 Scoliosis
This is a good example of a work in progress... we've sung this song in four versions so far, if you count the recording that didn't get finished for udder won. An early incarnation of moosebutter, with Adam and Ben, sang this to audition for a BYU a cappella jam, a jam we ended up singing Presidential Candidate for (must have been 2000, then, fall, since it was right before an election).
If you read the above lyrics, you get to a point where there are lots of *, because there are lyrics not yet decided upon... although we did decide on something for the recording, including additional verses, one about getting stuck in a tree, and other stuff. I don't remember. We'll release that song, sometime? Then you'll get the definitive version. That we will promptly change.
And though it was edited out of the recorded version, I still have a dream of one day singing a line of lyric about a pet lobster named Fabulous Dave.